Before I start the post I have to say that in this post I am not being prejudice or "nationalist". If I offend anyone with this post please let me know thank you. This incident happened to my friend in NUS about 2 to 3 weeks ago.
My friend was in the central library on Saturday rushing his report which was due in a few days time. He has been slogging it out for about 7 hours since 9 am.
At around 4pm, feeling tired he went to the restroom to freshen up. As he was only going to be away for a short duration, he left his laptop and belongings on the table and went to the restroom.
When he returned he realised that his laptop had switched off by itself. He was shocked as it was still switched on when went to the restroom. He then found out what went wrong. The socket that he was using had an extra user and the socket had been turned off so that it could be shared; his lap top's battery was not attached to the laptop when the socket was turned off.
He immediately turned on his laptop to check if his work was still present. To his horror it was no longer there as it has not been saved. Fueled with anger, he went forward to confront the user sharing the socket with him. The user was a Chinese national; my friend, disgusted by the person's action started quarreling with him.
His reason for quarreling with the Chinese national was that, he had not asked the friend of mine if it was possible to share the socket with him. He had assumed that it was fine to just turn off the socket as everyone had batteries within their laptops.
I guess I will leave the confrontation to every one's imagination. After the incident my friend developed a very bad impression of these Chinese nationals, and had to re-type his report.
On first impression, most people will see this as a conflict because of a lack of basic courtesy. However to me I see this incident as an inter-cultural conflict between Chinese nationals and Singaporeans. From my observations and experience, most of the Chinese nationals tend to keep within their own group and they hardly talk to any Singaporeans. Many of never had a chance to immerse themselves into the Singapore culture when they arrived in Singapore. They do not know much of the Singapore and may have assumed that when you require anything from someone, as long as it doesn’t cause any problems for the party it is ok not to ask. I personally have saw quite a few incidents such as this in NUS, such as taking up empty seats of the without asking the first occupant of the bench. Therefore incidents such as this are bound to happen. I guess more interactions between Singaporeans would be a good way to reduce such conflicts.
Personally if I was a foreigner in a country, I would first find out the culture and customs of the country as it would help reduce conflicts and misunderstandings between the locals. Most importantly practice basic courtesy when in doubt. If everyone practices basic courtesy, I guess such conflicts can too be reduced.
UCS1001 MME Tri2 2023-24 Dynamic Thinkers
2 weeks ago
Dear Keldren,
ReplyDeleteYour friend was certainly unfortunate in losing his data, and it is sad that the individual who unplugged his computer didn't ask first, but I wonder if we can stereotype/castigate a whole group of people (and a country of 1.3 billion), on the basis of one member's actions. There are discourteous assholes in every country, in every society, whether the US, China or Singapore. When you or I interact with one, and have a bad experience, should we generalize and blame the whole society?
At the same time, you seem to be making a general statement about the need for "foreigners" to adapt to the society that they might be visiting. Yes, I think that makes good sense, and I think many will agree with us. However, when we talk about the valued behaviors that we consider courteous, we should recognize that not every person, and certainly not every sociocultural group, views courtesy in the same way. What is considered courteous by some might be seen as discourteous by others.
Is there a place in the world for tolerance and understanding? I think so, and I hope so. That doesn't mean I don't get upset by other people's actions. It doesn't mean I never over-generalize and never stereotype.
But I do make a conscious effort at reflecting on my actions and reactions. Such an understanding forces me to use my brain rather than only my heart in situations where my ego has been threatened.
Does this make sense?
Hi Brad, thanks for your insightful comment.
ReplyDeleteI do agree that it is not fair to blame the whole society as a result of 1 person. However, the first impression that he has given to my friend must have been of a negative one. He is majoring in psychology in the arts faculty, and I doubt he has many chances to interact with Chinese nationals. And most of his interactions with the Chinese nationals has been bad. So I guess, the only impression that he has of these foreigners may be a negative one.
I guess most of the time it is easy to tolerate some of these foreigners' acts. However, there is still a limit to how much one can tolerate. Once that limit is crossed, conflicts are bound to happen.
I know what one deem as an courteous act may not be courteous to some others. Hence, I guess it is important to know and understand. That is where interaction comes into play. Hence, I guess it may be smart to go learn a nation's culture when your in a foreign country.
In conclusion, I do agree with you that it is important to use your brain more than go with your heart. Only follow your heart when you have understood what can be done and what cannot be done
Hey Keldren,
ReplyDeleteHaving read your post, I can't help but think that the culprit was a black sheep. If the culprit had been more humane (?) about it he would've cared if he switched off the other person's laptop. I would've waited for the person to return and then apologize profusely. At least it wouldn't have been so bad on the receiving end.
I myself have had pretty bad encounters with another group of people, but I remind myself not to stereotype, each time I meet a someone new (who belongs to that group). Hating can be quite tiring.
Cheers!
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteHey keldren,
ReplyDeleteWell first of all I do feel sorry for the guy. But, I don't think all the blame should go to the Chinese national guy. There is a saying "prevention is the cure".What I mean is that,if he kept saving the file once in a way he probably didn't have to re-write all over again. In my very first writing assignment in NUS (probably the EAP module) I was advised to keep saving in any case there is a misfortune such as this. It does make sense to be angry with the Chinese national guy but I think it is also his careless mistake.
I find the phrase that the Chinese nationals keeping to themselves very amusing.Being a foreigner I find that the same applies to some [tempted to say most] Singaporeans as well. For instance, in my class (which is about 50 odd) we do know each other but when it comes to hanging out or even the seating arrangements, I find the international students and the Singaporeans sit apart.At times it is frustrating when you have to go out of your way to make friends.In fact most of the Singaporeans I know are cos of group projects. This invisible grouping seems to be a general view among some of my other non-singaporean friends as well. However, I can't stereotype as there are others like you, Qi ying, Roy and so on.
I dont believe this is because they dont like the international students. It maybe cos they knew each other from JC or cos they have more common background. When it comes to the Chinese nationals I think the same could be said. They do have some difficulties in conversing in English. As a result, sometimes to avoid embarrassing themselves they tend to stick within their own groups where making conversations is so much easier. But, I do agree it is important to mingle and get to know the country and its customs that you would live in atleast for the next few years. And, just like Roy said sometimes we cant stereotype an entire group of people just cos of one person. I do hope your friend does not let this incident judge an entire community